Most of the time in life, we have a choice between an easy and a difficult option. In order to progress, we must force ourselves to take on challenges from time to time, otherwise we risk stagnating.
Flow is a psychic state in which our brain functions optimally. To reach flow, two conditions must be met: to have reached a certain level of competence in a domain and to achieve something difficult in this same domain. For example, you have trained hard in karate and you have achieved the level of black belt. Now imagine that you are fighting another black belt. It is very likely that you will reach a state of flow. Flow also allows you to lose the notion of time.
Difficulty Must Be Approached In Stages
What often happens is that we become victims of our unrealistic ambition. We want to achieve short-term feats without taking into account that learning new skills takes time. The result is that this rush deters many candidates and a significant number of people give up because of the gap between their results and their expectations. Don’t do what they do, move in increments, set reasonable goals and celebrate your small victories.
How Do You Deal With The Discomfort Of Everyday Life?
You have to manage your efforts and the discomfort of learning new skills. You can’t spend 100% of your day in a state of stress caused by a stressful situation. I would say that it is necessary to spend at least 10% of your time in a stressful situation (and learning), the ideal being in my opinion 20%. For your serenity and performance, I would say that relaxation (high skills, intermediate difficulty level) should be a significant part of your time.
What Are The Ways To Seek Discomfort?
Here we are dealing with the need to expand your comfort zone. You don’t want to go too fast because it could otherwise break down. Discomfort can be found on many levels, depending on your progress in different areas: emotional, physical, intellectual etc. There are simple and radical ways to diffuse discomfort on a daily basis:
– Talking to strangers
– Talking in public
– Making an intense physical effort
– Tasting exotic foods
– Taking an intensive course
Repetition To Tame Discomfort
If you do something uncomfortable every day, it will no longer be uncomfortable for you. Repetition allows you to make the discomfort comfortable.
Insurmountable Discomfort (The Limits Of Difficulty)
There are situations in which we cannot overcome the initial discomfort. This creates stress and anxiety that cannot be overcome by repetition. In this case, we must admit that we have weak points and that we cannot always overcome difficulties in the same way. It’s up to you to make your own assessment: is the goal you want to achieve worth wasting so much time and energy on? Is it a goal you really want to achieve? Is there not a better place to invest your time and energy?
Perseverance is good until it turns into stubbornness. If you’re not cut out for something, it’s better to go after what you are cut out for. You will only make better use of your time and energy. You have to be strategic and make choices that put you in the best position to become the best in your field. Difficulty should be a condiment, i.e. an ingredient in small quantities in your plate of resistance.
Find A Pillar Activity
In your daily life, it is desirable to have a task that you do that gets you used to challenges. Imagine that you have a stable and routine job, without great challenges, but in the evening you take up a combat sport. The level of stress that these training sessions can generate will help you in other facets of your life. You will be more enterprising and may be less afraid to change jobs, talk to strangers, etc. You don’t need (and you don’t have to) have your entire day be a series of challenges. Instead, choose to have a hobby that forces you to push yourself because it will have positive collateral effects.
What Lessons Can You Learn?
– Get used to challenges
– Repetition helps you expand your comfort zone
– If what you are doing goes against your nature, don’t push it
– Choose a hobby that helps you excel