Not Deciding Is Already Deciding
If you’re having trouble making up your mind and can put off making a decision, you’d better wait until you’re clearer in your mind. We often find it hard to decide because we’re overcome by strong emotions that cloud our judgment, a bit like moving mud clouding the river. To make the right decision, you need to calm your thoughts.
Slow Down: Apply The 25% Rule
When you slow down the movements of your body, your fingers, your breathing, your eyes, your head, your mouth when you speak, you create relaxation. A relaxed body leads to a relaxed mind. A relaxed mind is more lucid and able to feel things more clearly. When your body moves in slow motion, you give your whole being a chance to communicate with your brain – this is what we call intuition.
If you manage to slow down, even if only for 10 to 15 minutes, you’ll be able to tap into a treasure trove of wisdom. Your body will literally speak to you, and your mind will shut up for a moment to listen to what you have to say. The problem with stress is that it causes the mind to become obsessed with many things, and can be easily distracted. The mental overload created reinforces a frenetic activity that is particularly unsuited to deep work. Stress can be reduced by limiting the number of thoughts running through your mind at the same time. By slowing down, your mind will concentrate on the very act of slowing down, which will have the effect of eliminating all other parasitic thoughts. Generally speaking, if you manage to slow down by 25% of your usual speed, you’ll succeed in producing a noticeable effect.
Put Some Wu Wei Back Into Your Life
Much of what we do is unconscious. We are a body projected into space whose trajectory is known in advance. We only react to what’s around us, like a meteor attracted by the gravitational pull of much larger stellar objects. The problem is that we too often try to resist the flow of life, thinking that everything is within our control. It’s not. We do have a certain amount of control, but in reality, many of the things we experience or do are simply the result of actions we’ve taken before. We are an extension of ourselves, of our past lives, now ignored, of the thousands of conditions we have been subjected to, starting with those induced by childhood. To live according to wu wei means, as it were, to surf the waves of existence, not to fight against what we have no control over (the wave), but rather to accompany the forces we observe and give them another form. Wu wei means not concentrating on what we can control, but trying to use the forces at hand as best we can. In so doing, we stop trying to make a decision at all costs and instead develop our patience.
The Patience To Wait For Intuition
You have an intuition, but you often leave it silent because your mind is so busy. The main advantage of letting go is that you’ll find it easier to listen to your intuition. Your intuition is when your belly tries to communicate with your brain. Your belly is a kind of second brain, centralizing thousands of pieces of information sent to it by your body, and there’s even communication in reverse: your brain sends the worries it has to your body, which then analyzes them and formulates a response. The belly is slower than the brain, but it analyzes more deeply. It works by a sort of progressive decantation: annoyances are processed one after the other and then it gives its verdict. That’s why you have to learn to be patient and assume that you don’t know what decision to make. Indecision isn’t necessarily a bad thing; it’s just a sign that you need to give your intuition time to formulate an answer.
By Taking Action, You’ll Gather Information
Wu wei does not mean being paralyzed, blocked or inactive. On the contrary, it means continuing to be active and collecting valuable information through your actions. You don’t have to decide, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t do anything.
To Sum Up:
When you’re in doubt about what decision you should make, you have several options:
– You could simply decide not to go ahead at all.
– You could decide to slow down your body’s movements and your breathing, to put an end to the agitation that can take over your mind.
– You can decide to trust your intuition, acting patiently and waiting for it to speak to you.