Some things are timeless, while others change with every generation. It is therefore pointless, or even dangerous, to trust elders blindly when making all our life choices.
The worldview of the generations that came before us evolves, but never as fast as the world we live in.
While it is true that human psychology and the laws of physics or biology belong to the immutable, other fields change profoundly with each generation. This explains why the mechanisms that organize a society can become difficult to grasp, especially if one has not experienced these changes firsthand, as is often the case for older generations. It can therefore be risky to use the opinions of much older people as a compass for dealing with new issues. Since not all areas face this problem, it is important to understand when to listen to one’s parents… and when it’s better to turn a deaf ear.
Technology
The world is changing fast, especially because of technology’s impact on our lives. It has complex interconnections that are hard to understand if one is not contemporary with its uses or does not work in that industry. This is why many people struggle to grasp the implications of these new tools. Often, a child or a teenager understands the virtual world and the power dynamics involved in technology much better than an adult. The relationship between the real and virtual worlds shifts from one generation to the next.
One could simply say that virtuality is gaining importance, sometimes to the point of making real life secondary or even optional. The case of Japanese hikikomori, caricatural as it may be, shows how social life can fold entirely into the virtual world when the real one becomes too daunting. Technology becomes both a refuge and a trap, especially when virtual identity is constantly compared, scrutinized, or glorified.
Psychology
Looking at millennia-old works (the Iliad, the Bhagavad Gita, or biblical narratives), one quickly notices that human psychology has hardly changed. Humans are driven by the same forces—passion, power struggles, desires for conquest—which shape their relationship to the world. Even though humans evolve over centuries, their biology and psychology remain essentially the same. One needs tens of thousands of years to see meaningful changes in these areas. This is why advice from elders about psychology and human relationships remains relevant today—particularly in areas such as seduction.
History: Learn It From Those Who Lived It
If there is one field where the experience of elders is especially valuable, it is history, because they have lived it themselves. Of course, memory can be imperfect or distorted, but personal accounts can always be compared to official history, revealing contradictions or new insights.
Thinking About Work: It Changes Every Generation
If you think you need to listen to your parents to succeed in life (provided they succeeded themselves), you are only half right. Why? Because professional success can be defined as the meeting point between acquiring skills and matching them to the needs of the market.
While learning principles remain relatively stable from one generation to the next, the tools and the job market change dramatically. Parents can be good advisers when you’re young, especially regarding the development of good work habits. But later in life, they often lack the answers needed to navigate new employment challenges.
A young adult may not know more than their parents about the future, but they are usually less trapped in outdated paradigms. This can be an advantage for thinking flexibly and adapting to the changes of their time.
Family: It Changes Because the World Changes
Although the family remains a stable structure offering security and meaning, it is becoming harder to build because the conditions for its creation and flourishing are increasingly uncertain. Current wages and housing prices make starting a household difficult, even when both parents work. Today’s circumstances make dual-income households almost unavoidable, yet this dual occupation complicates daily family life.
The Meaning of Life: The Very Old Should Be Your Guides
At the end of their lives, people tend to regret the same things: not spending enough time with those they loved, working too much, worrying too much about money, etc. These reflections should help younger people orient their current lives.
We are constantly pushed to work more, live away from our families, and worry about the future. Our lives are often consumed by fear or excessive ambition. Living in the present might mean focusing on the most human things—simple but profound joys, time spent with loved ones.
Listening to the elderly about the direction of life is essential: after all, they are the ones who have gone all the way. They know what awaits us—what disappointments, what regrets, what wrong choices. Of course, this overlooks the survivor bias: many who died earlier may have been happier. Still, those who lived long may teach us valuable habits that contributed to a more peaceful life.
Even if you don’t change what you want to do, it is always useful to know what you want to avoid. Listening to the regrets of older people can help you understand what you should steer clear of in your own life.
